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Some Benefits of Rain Forest

Tom Woodruff

Iowa City Press-Citizen

December 18, 2005

[Note: This material is copyright by the Press-Citizen, and is reproduced here as a matter of "fair use" for non-commercial, educational purposes only. Any other use may require the prior approval of the Iowa City Press-Citizen.]

The Grand Rapids, Mich., Zoo is importing several endangered species female Bongo gorillas to mate with their few remaining males. Extensive research has been done on the Bongo, and I believe it to be of much interest to the Coralville-Iowa City area.

Bongos live in rain forests. If a suitable habitat were built, say in the brownfields of Coralville, it would definitely attract them and add greatly to the much needed home sales across the river in the Peninsula Neighborhood.

Bongo families live in family groups and rely heavily on tenure assuring them of a nearby user-friendly environment. They are big and display a dexterity that could be readily adapted to football but more likely they would enjoy Iowa basketball because of their nocturnal and mating habits.

Imagine a Bongo mounted in every fraternity and elected leaders house from controlling their population through annual "Bongo-Bow hunts." What interesting late night council meetings, video taped to sell as fundraisers. No budget short fall ever again.

But best of all, Bongos love pork, something that Iowa and a rain forest will have in abundance. Think Bongos! That's the Iowa we all want and must get to know!

P.S. Lighten up, it's the holiday season.

Tom Woodruff
North Liberty